Oh my, here I am, in the middle of one of my most challenging combo of events – Christmas and traveling…. two things that can bring such joy…. and such angst too. And one of my coping mechanisms is to get raw and real, and write… so here goes…. (you’ll find a concise list of my arsenal for managing the stress of Christmas with various coping mechanisms at the bottom of this post, please feel free to skip the raw and personal and go right to action!)
It’s December already, so it’s Christmas month. And I have a one year old, who I’m currently on a two month long-haul sabbatical with. I love traveling… and I really don’t love it at the same time. It looks glamorous, and once you get to the places you’re going, it certainly can be, but it’s often not…. because really there is no place like home (that’s why we call it home right?!). But we also have to leave our post to grow. So periodically I leave and get way out of my comfort zone…..
I personally find this time of the year incredibly challenging. My otherwise introverted nature has to be out and on… especially when I am visiting my home land of New Zealand and parents, family and friends I see maybe once a year, if that. It’s constant daily socializing, and moving from one place to lay my head to another. I find myself struggling with my addictive nature which pulls me in many different directions through the thought patterns in my mind, often associating one person with memories I would rather forget, others with ways of being that I have otherwise long left behind. Old shadows come into the light, my emotional skillset is tested, stretched and torn, and then, on top of all that shenanigans, there’s this new role of motherhood tugging at my heart strings in brand new ways…. and, to be honest, things can get quite noisy inside as my body-mind protests through the chasm of back then and this now.
To add to all of that I also personally really enjoy winter occurring at the end of the year, and right after fall (jumping from fall back to summer is simply confusing on multiple levels mucking the noise around in my head even more…. can you relate?). I appreciate the calling to go inward, to be more still and quiet. Here, in the Southern Hemisphere, where spring is turning to summer and everyone is ramping up after a long, wet winter, coming up and out, instead of down and in. I feel I am going against the flow of what my body-mind naturally wants to do. So I struggle with what feels like a personal affront with the Goddess. Combine that with the stress of uncertain ground upon which to walk and I find myself physically, emotionally and psychologically exhausted.
BUT…. thank goddess for the practice that I have and the way of being with my mind that I have. I have my arsenal of tools that I use on a daily basis, not just at Christmas time, but every single day. I’ve listed them below. They are what call me back to myself, my truth, my stability and that which allow me to anchor my structure around this little guy…. he’s my biggest life coach ever, and he needs me to be his stable constant through all the moving and grooving in different places, countries, time zones and cultures. These tools are what re-energize and ground me, they’re what keep me open and hopeful and they’re what cultivate within me the patience and compassion to be present in situations I would otherwise innately run from…. and without them I would no doubt be the bitch-troll from hell that truly nobody wants to know… and I can’t imagine I’d raise a very healthy man either.
So I share this arsenal of sanity anchors with you with love from my heart to yours. If you have any questions or would like my support in plugging you in to your own stress management arsenal, just let me know. I am here to serve. And it is my pure gift that I can. And in saying all that… I’m still a work in progress with plenty of room for improvement also… that’s why we call this a practice right?!
Here’s my Christmas Arsenal:
1. Take time to be with your own breath. Breathe, knowing you are whole, complete and perfect, just the way you are, and that there is always plenty of room for improvement. In this way I recognize that I may not be perfect how someone else would like me to be, but I am perfect for me, just as you are perfect for you, and that’s whats more important. This is the kind of breathing that takes you all the way down into your body and holds you from within with tender loving care so you can know the truth of who you really are, reminding you that all is always well, even when it doesn’t feel that way. Being present with the breath, even for just five minutes a day, will activate your parasympathetic nervous system and allow you to connect to the reservoir of truth that is your inner wellspring to freshly inspired ideas that create health and wealth, both within you and around you.
2. Don’t take things personally. You’ll be in a world of pain by January if you do?! It’s not about you, it’s about whatever is going on in their head. Just as it’s also not about them, it’s about what’s going on in your head.
3. Take five more minutes to be present with the Breath.
4. You are what you consume. If you’re drinking alcohol and caffeine and eating shitty, sugary foods every day, you will notice an increase in angry, anxious, paranoid and delusional thinking. You are not your thoughts, but the food and drink you consume will inform the way you think…. give yourself and everyone around you a break by feeding yourself clean, organic, fresh from the ground kind of food and fresh clean water. Not all water is created equal…. and tap water is generally not the way to go either – even when people so ignorantly tell you it’s fine, generally it’s not. If you want more info on what is the best water to drink for your body, as well as the planet, message me back and I’ll share some secrets with you. And no, it doesn’t come in a plastic bottle.
5. Take another five minutes to be present with your Breath.
6. Consider using CBD to support your nervous system, as well as reduce inflammation and pain as well as to reduce cravings…. this is a bit like putting on a teflon coat that allows your nervous system to ramp down so that the things that used to bother you tend to slide off you and slip away more easily. CBD allows overwhelm to subside and panic to recede into the background. What used to be a point of tension becomes a moment of pause before you more skillfully navigate your way forward, safely, and emotionally free. I have a gift code for anyone that want’s a $50 or 25% discount (whichever is bigger) off their first purchase – and sorry but this is just for my US based brothers and sisters – check out this link here and use KALILOVE as your gift code. This stuff is super organic, pure and clean, as well as simple – just full spectrum organic hemp seed oil, stevia and peppermint essential oil to make it taste fabulous (we also have one without this now too if you don’t want it to be pepperminty). There is no alcohol either so it’s a great alternative for those of us who struggle around Christmas with alcohol addiction, this can be an enormous aid in supporting that clean and clear mind space you’ve spent so much time cultivating. And for those of you still wanting to cultivate it, this will make that path much easier too. No THC either, so you won’t get a head high, just a relaxed body/nervous system.
7. Take just five minutes again to Breathe.
8. Superfood mocktails with uber organic, GMO free, whole food products… Simply add water, shake and drink. No mess. No fuss. Nothing to clean up. Liberating in so many ways, and the key component of my daily arsenal that has kept me semi sane on this crazy journey of continual movement that I am currently on (also that which put the nutrients back in my body and rebalanced my hormones after post natal depression nearly took me out nine months postpartum). If you’d like to join me on a 40 Day Body Reset starting sometime in January then ping me back, I’d love to share the process with you – and I have $50-$100 of free superfoods to share with anyone who wants to jump on that with me too. Check out this link here for more info or connect with me to discuss your personal path. I’m happy to share everything I’ve learned so far with you.
9. Remember to take five minutes to be with the Breath!! Are you getting the gist of how important it is to breathe yet?! And, now you’ve just done 20 minutes of meditation in one day… you’re well on your way to becoming a daily meditator!
10. Goddess Practice – check out this blog here for free, downloadable meditations you can practice with and insight into how I enlist my troops from the Yogic pantheon of Gods and Goddesses – these are the true players in my arsenal of navigating stressful moments.